Forrest Frank anally penetrated by hunky Latino trade, says he "painted all the shades of brown" during first bottoming experience

🚫 Mashallah, this article was not AI generated 🚫

It's a Thursday night. I'm trying to relax. But my flatmate, Christian singer Forrest Frank, is so jobless ever since his album failed to make the charts. He's been sitting at his computer all night, seemingly unaware he can download Grindr on a phone. "What's my iCloud password?" he asked me expectantly when I directed him to its App Store page. I sighed, exasperated, and walked away. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door, and a nervous shuffle from the room next door. A creak and a whisper, a giggle and a belt buckle. I put on my noise-cancelling headphones... but it wasn't enough. Nothing could've prepared me for the assault of my senses but working on an animal farm, where the sheer amount of excrement might have started to condition me to the state I would find my living space in when the mysterious guest had left.

"I think the kids call them a Latino trade", Forrest told me, stained feet leaving marks on the tiled floor as he whips around the kitchen, making some sort of ethnically English abomination. "He just kinda laid me down and took care of me, you know", well, I thought, now I do know. But I really didn't want to. I didn't want to see, or smell, or hear, or - I left the apartment as my lungs started to expand rapidly and the sweat from my forehead started to fall to the ground like nuclear snow. It wasn't enough. It's never enough with Forrest, it seems, judging by the stoic looking tattooed man making his way into my apartment as my back falls against the wall of the hallway.

New message. "Forrest Frank: 6 photos 📸". Breath trembling, fingers hovering over the notification, my journalistic curiosity overrides my animalistic repulsion. What I see permanently tattoos my mind. One Forrest Frank, arched back in the doggy style, and a Latino man with a brown ooze falling from his open smiling mouth.

That's the moment I decided enough is enough. This is my house, my rules. If I, Dr Taras Danylovych-Kryvchenko, can run the University of Sexology Bachelor of Engineering programme, surely I can kick a "straight" twink out of my flat. Mustering up the courage of a caged lion to overpower its captor, I burst into my flat, inadvertently pushing aside the tattooed man - putting me square in the firing range of a pink, pulsing, hairy muzzle. "I'm going to paint you ALL shades of brown", says the gun before it pulls the trigger. Forrest completely paralyzes me, head to toe, in faeces the texture of the KATSEYE Erewhon smoothie.